sexta-feira, 2 de setembro de 2016

O Impeachment: como o brasileiro é bonitinho

Querido diário:

Parece que isto aqui precisa ficar documentado para o resto da eternidade dos leitores deste blog. A revista Economist falando nas razões que levaram os deputados a votar a favor do impeachment iniciado por Eduardo Cunha, a pedido de três advogados militantes da direita, um, inclusive, esquerdista desasado:

ON SUNDAY April 17th the lower house of Brazil’s congress held a special session to vote on whether the president, Dilma Rousseff, should be put through an impeachment trial. The charge is that her government had fiddled government accounts, concealing their parlous state. But hardly any of the federal deputies who spoke in the raucous, viciously partisan televised special session even mentioned this. Instead, as opponents of impeachment assailed them as liars, thieves, bigots and coup-mongers, they cited a more eclectic bunch of reasons for their votes. Here is a small selection, translated by The Economist, from a list collated by Cecília Olliveira, an observer of Brazilian politics:

For the birthday of my granddaughter
For the foundations of Christianity
For Bruno and Felipe
For the Masons of Brazil
For rural producers, because if they don’t plant there will be neither lunch nor dinner
Because of the proposal that children can have sex-change procedures [while still] in school
To end the profitability of being unemployed or a layabout
For the congregation of the “Quadrangular” [an evangelical church]
For the aged and children
For an end to welfare dependency
For my mother Lucimar
For charismatic renewal
For Brazilian doctors
To put an end to CUT [the biggest Brazilian grouping of trade unions] and its no-good types
For the love of this country
For an end to the Petrobras scandal and those who profited from it
For the Republic of Curitiba [a Brazilian state capital; Sérgio Moro, the crusading judge leading the investigation into corruption at the state-controlled oil giant, Petrobras, hails from there]
In memory of my father
For Campo Grande [the state capital of Mato Grosso do Sul], the loveliest brunette of Brazil
For gun control
Because of the communism that threatens this country
For the fearless and pioneering people of the state of Rondônia
For BR 429 [an interstate highway]
For all the insurance brokers
For my unborn daughter Manoela
For my 93-year-old mother who is at home
In homage to my city’s founding day
For peace in Jerusalem
For the best state, Tocantins
For my mother, who at the moment is fighting for her life
For the sector that generates wealth: agribusiness
For my son Breno and my beloved military police of São Paulo
For the military of 1964 [who took control of Brazil in a coup]
So that we don’t become Reds like in Venezuela and North Korea
For my 78-year-old father who taught me the principles of the word of God
For Sandra, for Erica, for Vítor, for Jorge, and for my grandson who is on the way
For my state of São Paulo, governed for the past 20 years by honest politicians from my party
For my wife and my daughter, who are my principal electorate
As tribute to my only and true riches, my daughters
For an end to the “colonels” [the big landowners and rich families who effectively rule much of north and north-east Brazil]
For the armed forces who are now pensioners without a salary
In tribute to my father Roberto Jefferson [a Brazilian politician implicated in a massive political scandal in 2005]
For Carlos Alberto Brilhante Ustra, the Terror of Dilma [Colonel Brilhante Ustra was the chief torturer under the military dictatorship]
For street-dwellers who sleep on the street, are born on the street and die on the street
In order that no government stands against the nation of Israel
For science and technology
For my wife Mariana and daughter little Mariana
Against the Bolivarian dictatorship
For the truckers
For free men and morality
For the honour of the people of Minas Gerais [a Brazilian state]
For Canção Nova [a Catholic radio and television network]; for the Brazilians who live with drugs
For my aunt Eurides, who looked after me when I was small
For you, mum
For the libertarian traditions of Minas Gerais
I forgot to mention my son. For you, Paulo Henrique! Kiss!
For the cancer hospital
In tribute to the victims of BR 251 [an interstate highway]
To honour the flag of Minas Gerais
I am a leader of the majority; I am not a leader of the minority

Pode? Seja como for, é a homenagem que presto aos senadores que votaram a favor do impeachment, pois -em sua inominável compreensão dos fatos do mundo- acharam que "crime de responsabilidade" é o que Aécio Neves entende por "crime de responsabilidade".

P.S. Pensei que todas aquelas expressões jogadas do português ao inglês eram o que não eram, isto é, que, por exemplo, o primeiro orador queria dizer "Voto contra o impeachment para que a liberdade volte a nascer", algo assim.
P.S.S. a imagem é daqui.

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